Today has been a long, scary day. This morning I was cramping pretty badly while at church...was a tad worried but didn't think much of it because you have to get used to a certain amount of discomfort when pregnant. The worry, however, started shortly after I got home and began bleeding. Actual blood. Not good. So I told Dahmon what was going on, freaked out and was crying while talking to the nurse. She said it was 50/50 whether I go in to the ER or not, but given that I was not going into shock and the severity of the things I described to her (which in her mind were not as bad as they were in my mind), she erred on the side of putting me on bedrest for the day.
Daniel threatened to call our parents and tattle on me if he caught me not taking it easy at all today. Younger brothers, yeesh!
The bleeding and cramping have kept up for much of the day. I called the nurse hotline back partway through the day because I freaked out again...but she said I basically needed to just take it easy. If this is a miscarriage in progress, there is nothing that can be done to stop the process. Given some online research I did this afternoon, about 1 in 4 women experience some bleeding during their pregnancies. About 50% of those women go on to have healthy pregnancies. Obviously, I hope to be a part of that 50%, but for now I'm going to be real with ya'll and just state flat out that I'm freaked out. God calls us to trust in him, but no amount of trust in the Lord guarantees an automatic healing when something ails a loved one, even if that loved one is not born. Can God heal anything? Of course. Does that mean said healing is automatic and to be expected no matter what? Nope. My prayer is that God do what he needs to do according to his will and help me be okay with whatever that means.
So we are beginning week 13 - fingerprints are in place. Veins and organs would be visible through Baby's skin (which I hope remains invisible to our eyes for the next 27 weeks!) were we to see It. Body is starting to catch up with its head. It is about 3 inches long (apparently the size of a medium shrimp). AND if it is a girl, then its eggs are already formed!
Please pray that Baby is safe. I'm a little scared, but trusting the Lord.
Here's a pictographic representation of Wk 13 baby (I'll start posting actual pregger pics of me once these three things happen: a) Baby is officially in the second trimester, b) we verify that everything is alright after the worrisome events of today, and c) we find the cord that connects camera to computer. : )