1
Corinthians 13:4-8a
Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails. (NIV)
Sermon Scripture: 1
Samuel 1:12-20
Now this man used to go up year by year from his town to worship and to sacrifice to the Lord of hosts at Shiloh, where the two sons of Eli, Hophni and Phinehas, were priests of the Lord. On the day when Elkanah sacrificed, he would give portions to his wife Peninnah and to all her sons and daughters; but to Hannah he gave a double portion, because he loved her, though the Lord had closed her womb. Her rival used to provoke her severely, to irritate her, because the Lord had closed her womb. So it went on year by year; as often as she went up to the house of the Lord, she used to provoke her. Therefore Hannah wept and would not eat. Her husband Elkanah said to her, “Hannah, why do you weep? Why do you not eat? Why is your heart sad? Am I not more to you than ten sons?”
Ah, patience. As you may know, Dahmon
and I have been traveling through a series on the 9 fruits of the
Spirit as listed by Paul in Galatians. Last week Dahmon spoke on
peace. We've also discussed joy and love. This week we move to
patience.
Patience. Authors in the New Testament
have a habit of using Old Testament figures as examples for patience
(James cites Job, for example), and we shall do the same here. In
the Scripture reading for today, we read about Elkanah.
Now, Elkanah was a man with two wives:
Hannah and Peninnah. Here we find him and his family during their
yearly pilgrimage to the temple in Shiloh to offer worship and
offerings to the Lord. According to the Scripture, Hannah was the
picture of dejection and miserableness because she was barren.
Peninnah, after all, had “sons and daughters”, and delighted in
lording them over Hannah – the text says she provoked Hannah
severely.
Children in that time were status and
assurance for the future. Being barren threatened Hannah's very life
for two major reasons. 1) Under the law of the time, Elkanah could
legally divorce her for not bearing him sons and fulfilling her role
as a woman, and 2) if Elkanah were to die suddenly, Hannah would have
no male to support her. For Elkanah's part, he had no male heir from
Hannah, which was disastrous for his part of the family tree.
Anyways, Hannah was miserable because
she could not bear children. To rub salt in an already open wound,
the fact that Hannah's name is listed first when the wives are
mentioned likely means that she was Elkanah's first wife. Though
polygamy was not uncommon during their time, some scholars think it
is likely that Elkanah took Peninnah as a wife after Hannah proved
unable to bear him sons.
And bear him sons Peninnah did...but
where did that leave Hannah?
Miserable. Not eating. Weeping.
Worrying Elkanah, who responded to her in love despite the fact that
she could not bear him sons and despite the fact that she was surely
hard to be around.
Poor Elkanah! Surely his was not a
peaceful life, as one of his wives was constantly dejected and
lamenting her condition, while the other was gloating and being
difficult to the other! Imagine what his home life must have been
like – this is like living with sibling rivalry to a whole new
level!
Yet he responded to Hannah with nothing
but a love that went against the divorce that his culture said would
have been perfectly permissible...even expected. Scripture says
Elkanah would do his level best to show Hannah how much he loved her:
when he was doling out special portions of a particular food,
he gave twice as much to Hannah as he gave to Peninnah. He tries to
encourage her to eat, to not be so sad. He loves her so much! He
even asks her if he isn't worth as much to her as ten sons,
indicating that she is such to him. It seems like he did this every
year....
He loved her dearly and showed it
despite the fact that she was barren in a society where being barren
did not mean whole. Where being barren was grounds for divorce.
Elkanah is the one at whom we are
looking today as an example of patience.
What do you think about when you
hear the word “patience”?
Patience is often defined as “the
capacity to accept or tolerate delay, trouble, or suffering without
getting angry or upset.” Patience
is enduring under difficult circumstances, exhibiting self-control
and calm in the face of distress and/or waiting for something.
In this context, patience was Elkanah loving Hannah through
the difficult situation and showing her that love despite her
less-than-whole societal status in a society that said he could ditch
her with no repercussions for not giving him sons.
Isn't this what God does?
Despite all of our shortcomings,
despite us constantly demanding and requesting things of God in the
midst of our despair, despite society saying that we are not whole,
or somehow unclean, or not worth love and patience, despite our
abundant impatience, despite all of this God says “I love you and
let me show you how!”
God responds to us in love when the
world says He shouldn't.
What if part of patience, not all of it
– but part of it, is exactly that: responding to a situation in
love rather than frustration when the world gives you every right be
frustrated. “The fruit of the Spirit is patience.” Part of the
fruit of the Spirit is responding to a difficult situation in an
unexpected way, one saturated with love and grace and lacks impulsive
reactions that we later regret.
I have a younger brother named Daniel.
I love him dearly, but he tries my patience...and don't siblings
(spouses, friends, children) know just exactly how to push our
buttons to try our patience!
A few years back, my parents were
living in Arizona. My brother and I decided to drive down there from
MN to visit them for Christmas. It was a great drive...but when you
put two people in a car together for several days and add a flat
tire, patience wears thin! On our drive back home (which took 3
days), one of our tires was losing air...fast! Whenever we stopped
for gas, we had to add air to the tire. Obviously something was
wrong, but it wasn't until we stopped for the night that we saw the
problem – a nail. We had some fix-a-flat...but then started
arguing over who was going to put it into the tire. I wanted to
because I'd never done so before and wanted to learn a new skill.
Daniel wanted to because he had done so before and he just wanted to
go in the hotel and get some sleep. In a beautiful display of lack
of patience with one another, our argument escalated until we were
screaming at each other and I was literally stamping my foot in
frustration like a three year old having a tantrum. My brother
grabbed the car keys and reared his hand back like he was going to
throw them in the bushes. I grabbed his hand and said “STOP!”....and
we paused.
Now, people often tell me that I have
infinite patience, but in that moment I was fresh out of it for my
brother. I was tired and angry...so was Daniel. Two people
provoking each other mightily had taken a molehill life circumstance
and turned it into a mountain because we were responding to each
other in anger. Doing so had at that moment robbed us of our love,
joy, peace...and patience. I let go of Daniel's hand and turned
around for a moment to recollect myself, and to pray...for patience.
With God's help, I was then able to face my brother again and explain
why I had gotten angry, apologize, learn from it, and move on.
Eventually we took turns putting in the fix-a-flat, but that wasn't
the point. The point was that we needed to reorient ourselves to God
in the middle of a very frustrating, patience-robbing situation.
Elkanah was in the midst of a
frustrating, patience-robbing situation. One of his wives was
despondent and refused to be comforted despite his best efforts. His
other wife was intentionally being irritating and gloating about her
children. And this was a situation that endured for a long time.
Scripture says “so it went on year after year.” Imagine the
scene – constant bickering, little peace, loud noises!
But what was his response?
Scripture does not say that Elkanah
divorced Hannah for not bearing him sons, which was certainly his
right under Hebrew law at the time. It does not say that he yelled
at the women for arguing. It says that he responded in love. He
responded to a despondent woman by showering her with love instead of
losing his patience. He persevered in showering her with that love -
“so it went on year after year”.
This is one aspect of what Paul is
talking about when he says patience is fruit of the Holy Spirit. The
Holy Spirit working in us is available to help us cultivate the
practice of responding to a difficult situation in love rather than
anger, frustration, etc.
I'm not saying this is easy. Turning
away from my brother and reorienting myself through prayer instead of
clobbering him wasn't easy – and goodness knows I've clobbered him
in the past. I'm sure it wasn't easy for Elkanah to consistently
respond to Hannah in love (at least according to what we know about
him from Scripture).
The key is that patience as fruit of
the Holy Spirit means that it is something that God wants to help us
develop, and that He lives out in us. He is ready to help us show
that persistent love in any situation. Patience is that pause, that
deep breath, the “mommy time-out” to calm down before responding
to a child who has been irksome. Patience is the husband who
responds to his crabby wife not by hiding from her or being crabby in
return, but by listening, hugging, and asking what can be done.
Patience is the love response when the crabby response is easier.
Patience is recognizing that we do not
have to depend solely on our own strength to show persistent love.
We can lean on God, recognizing that He is the source of a love that
defies societal expectations. That is kind of what Jesus is all
about.
No comments:
Post a Comment